Pizza’s Lazy Brother

We had a major breakthrough in the father-son relationship yesterday. It wasn’t anything you’d think… it wasn’t a bonding moment that most non-parents would immediately think of when talking about bonding with your child… but those of us who grew up in the ’80s and ’90s understand the spiritual type experience that comes from taking the first bite of your very first English Muffin Pizza.  

Jackson’s palette consists of liking hotdogs, toast, donuts, chicken nuggets and pizza. But it’s about time where my son becomes a man… he needed this day to come… this is a more important day in the life of a young man than even the birds and the bees talk. The day you are first introduced the meal that will literally get you through toddler years-college is a monumental occasion. I’m thankful that it was me who was able to introduce Jax to this nutritious and delicious meal. 

The next step on the trail to becoming a true snack connoisseur is introducing the little guy to bagel bites… English Muffin Pizza’s lazy younger brother. It’s no my job to help him decide which he will like better… it’s just my job as a father to provide him with the opportunity to decide for himself.

There comes a time in every man’s life when he realizes who he is and what he’s all about. And that time comes when he finally chooses the path he will set upon… that path which will feed him and his friends for the rest of his adolescent life (and honestly his adult life): Bagel Bites or EM Pizzas. 

Honestly, I think this is one of the most important question every boy needs to ask himself; it’s the point when boys become men. Now I’m not here to judge anybody for which side they ultimately place themselves on, nor will I judge my son for the choice in lifelong snackhood he makes… But let me make this crystal clear: NEVER TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT! If you prefer Bagel Bites, you are lazy… the reward at the end is always worth the effort and this is the case and point of that motto.

I understand how amazing Bagel Bites are I mean think about it… they take two of the greatest inventions in the world, pizza and bagels, and just makes one delicious snack all in one (and it’s already puts them together for you!) I have to imagine that not even Gordon Ramsey or Bobby Flay have ever created something as perfect as that. Trust me bagel bites were the BHS Boys Basketball team’s snack of choice back in the day. Josh, Quez and I could house a couple packs of them in one sitting on game day. I know the significance of the Bagel Bite. 

Yet, still to this day… I prefer the thin crusted, home made sauce and melty REAL mozzarella cheese of the OG Snack… the English Muffin Pizza. I know Jax loved them too! 

PS: How long do you actually cook English muffin pizzas for?… And does it matter if the English muffins are oatmeal, cinnamon flavored? …asking for a friend.

*BTW pizza in any form is always a good choice. ​​

​