I Love Watching My Sons Compete

I love watching people compete. I love more than anything the fire that drives athletes to do things no one thinks they can do. Not the champion, not the MVP, but the little extra that pushes people to be the best at what they do (read Slaying the Dragon by Michael Johnson).

When I was younger, I couldn’t ever imagine anyone having the drive that I had because at the time I thought it was just me, like nobody else could understand it. However this fall I watched my boys show up every weekend side by side with their teammates to a game that were so new to them. I watched the fire in their eyes burn and the excitement for each other and their teammates as the weather got colder and the games grew more important.

My sons who showed grit, determination and teamwork. Neither were ready to sign NFL contracts and neither still have a firm grip on the rules (IE Oliver’s stiff arm through defenders, or Jax’ suplex block of a linebacker), but the love they showed for the game itself and what it meant to be a teammate could not be measured by a score or a championship.

While both boys’ teams had a chance at a championship, both feel just short. Short of a win, but not short on the desire to keep playing. Oliver’s loss in the playoff semifinals resulted in him asking if they can plan another game right after, even if it didn’t count. Jax refused to agree to turn in his jersey and helmet, “I don’t want to dad, I love being part of this team!”

While we obviously want them to earn those victories and at times, those are the games we celebrate most, Steph and I just want the boys to have fun and embrace these years doing what they love to do. Of course we want them to develop strong athletic skills (which I sort of sarcastically describe here):

And here:

I want them to develop strong character traits, self-control, discipline, respect and teamwork, because those traits will last a lifetime. One thing I learned this season, is the drive that I thought only I had… (that young naive thought)… my boys have it and I couldn’t be more proud!

Flag Football

Flag Football?… Not what I’d expected, but I know enough about football in general to know that Oliver would enjoy a sport where he could run non stop and then occasionally (even though it’s against the rules) tackle someone! He bought in quickly last year. He enjoyed his best friends being on his team and his cool neighbor being his Head Coach (even if said neighbor only had the second best lawn on the street).

Clearly though, I couldn’t just watch from the sideline… I had to coach him. (Which is so completely different from Jax who flourishes on his own and does leaps and bounds better in football without me as his coach).

I soon discovered that football wasn’t just something Oliver would do for fun. It was quickly becoming an identity. One that was also becoming something of a slight obsession. He carries a football around the house and even after two hours of practice he asks if his friends can come over and practice (mind you it’s pitch black outside on a school night).

I can’t help but see how these games are like a practice run for the hurdles and setbacks of life. This football season has so far been a lesson in adjusting expectations. For him and for us. We watched him run for passes he couldn’t reach, have his flag grabbed at crucial moments, and be run over by kids who were bigger and more experienced than he was.

Oliver though, at least to his mom and dad, even in a loss has outshined our own expectations. While his smile is big and he enjoys goofing around with his teammates more than anything, when the whistle blows something happens to him. He changes into a lion, Barry Sanders to be specific. He had exceptional agility, balance, and acceleration.

Oliver, like Sanders has such a low center of gravity (probably because he’s six years old) allowing him to make rapid cuts and change directions on a dime. He uses unbelievably quick jukes (or as he calls it “a Boop” to evade tacklers, making defenders miss with ease. “The BOOP” as it’s been called (he literally couldn’t say the word “Juke” and started calling it a BOOP) has absolutely left multiple broken ankles on fields across the shoreline this summer. His ability to stop and start abruptly, combined with his burst of speed, have made him one of the most elusive runners in K-1 Flag Football history.

All joking aside, while I’m sure the other coaches can agree he can use a bit more work on his listening skills… his love for his coaches, teammates and the game itself is growing by the day and the fun his dad is having coaching him is too!

Tackle Football

Last weekend, I sat on the sidelines reliving my Pop Warner and high school football days. With that being said, I’ve finally come to the realization that I’m officially living vicariously through my sons. This was never more evident than it was this weekend when I helped Jax strap on his shoulder pads and pull over his white #87 jersey.

Those WHITE on WHITES though… 🔥

It was surreal watching him walk towards his teammates as he buttoned up his chinstrap and helmet as I had all those years ago. Except, unlike I had pictured, he didn’t my help. He jogged off towards the field, but turned around just quick enough to give me a thumbs-up.

I had to stop and take in what was happening. He didn’t need me anymore… at least not then… because he had his teammates. It is so evident that his growth and independence continues to develop as his confidence levels increase.

I’ve watched him grow from the first practice- to now- more than I’ve ever imagined possible. I can not believe how much his coaches and teammates (and biggest fan: Oliver) have influenced him. Jax has shown drive and determination that I’ve never seen in him before.

His first game this weekend was a success as they won 30-6. A win is even more important when it involves waking up at 6am on a Sunday. But but if it ends in watching him and his teammates celebrate their accomplishment together, then it was all worth it.

However, as much football is a team game, there was a moment in this game in which I saw something in him that I wasn’t ready for.

There has been:

“The Ice Bowl”

“The Catch”

“The Immaculate Reception”

“The Philly Special”

But until this weekend there hadn’t been “The Block”

I’m not even sure many professional players would be capable of what Jax was asked to do. He was sent in at wide receiver a position he had never played and was asked to make a block. I’ll block on someone very athletic, quicker and faster.

As he lined up and he’s number 87 jersey thoughts of Jordy Nelson, running past a cornerback for a deep touchdown thrown by Aaron Rodgers in the Super Bowl, ran through my head… but instead… Today, on this play, Jackson charge toward the cornerback and put on one of the most technically sound blocks I have literally ever seen. He created a massive hole that you could drive a dump truck through… And his teammate broke a long touchdown.

He had many other impressive plays… And plenty of times where I had to laugh as he chirped in the ears of the other players he was bulldozing!!! I don’t know what he was saying, but I saw a different side of Jackson today and while I was incredibly proud of him… The most important part was, he was incredibly proud of himself and in the end, isn’t that what matters most, that you can look yourself in the mirror and say today I did the best that I could for myself and for others.

He’s show leadership (that I’ve always seen), but today he was named Captain, by his coaches and followed by a round of applause by his team… the smile on his face and the pride is his voice when he told me will forever be remembered. Thank You Football, thank you coaches and most of all THANK YOU JACKSON!

Owners of the Green Bay Packers

About a month ago, it was a normal weekday afternoon as I walked down the driveway to the mailbox. Nothing pressing was on my mind other than how many Amazon Prime packages I might find. Today however, instead of finding boxes, bills or ads for extended car warrantees, I found a letter from almost 1,000 miles away (and no it wasn’t my acceptance letter from Hogwarts… although you have to admit that would be life changing too).

The envelopes were emblazoned with the Green Bay Packers logo stamped on both. I had tears in my eyes because I knew immediately what was inside, but would have to conceal both my excitement and the documents that were now in my hands.

People ask me all the time, (as I know they will both boys), how in the world did I become a Packers fan. Whenever I’m asked this question my head begins swimming with reasons…would it be Sterling Sharpe, who was Calvin Johnson before Calvin Johnson was even born and also happens to be the reason why I wore number 84 in my high school football days… Al Bundy reference). How about Brett Favre, the “Gunslinger of the North,” who kept us in every game? Or what about Charles Woodson, who displayed the heart of a lion and tried to play through a broken collarbone in order to bring the Lombardi Trophy home? Those are all obvious choices of why I became a packers fan. There are hundreds to choose from; I mean, come on! We’re the most legendary franchise in the NFL, right?

Then again, there is more to the Green Bay Packers than the legendary figures who once and still do roam The Frozen Tundra. To me, there is something else that makes our fan base a “real living, breathing thing.” Family… Vince Lombardi said it, my parents said it… heck, I’m saying it now… family is what makes being a Packers fan so special.

My boys were born seven and four years ago respectively and the joys of parenthood sometimes gets lost in dirty diapers, school events and sleepless nights… when the thoughts of Rodgers to Adams are far, far away. Yet, it’s that quick thought of ARod lofting a touchdown pass on a perfectly thrown back shoulder pass… even if for just a fleeting second, that gets me so excited. The thought of sharing the Green Bay Packers with my sons, the thought of Sundays with them in my lap, the thought of bringing them to Lambeau for the first time… that’s what it’s all about. It is the thought of something that is bigger than me, bigger than them… because the Packers make it about “US.”

Now that my family has grown, I have the opportunity to share something that is more than a game with my boys. And although there is no doubt there will be stories about that Gunslinger of the North, and the guy they called The Golden Boy, it will be more about the experiences father and sons share together. Besides, Coach Lombardi couldn’t have been wrong… he added it in his Top 3… God, FAMILY and THE GREEN BAY PACKERS

You see the Green Bay Packers are more than a team. These documents I was holding are about passing on a legacy. Now, both my boys can join me by saying they are more than fans… they are now the proud Owners of the Green Bay Packers.

A Decade to Remember

As 2019 its door and the start of a new decade opens, it’s a time to reflect and look forward to the amazing things on the horizon. As far decades go… the 2010s were as Larry David would say, “pretty, pretty, pretty good.” And considering this last one was my fourth… I know a good decade when I see one. But really… four decades… that is pretty crazy. I’m now 40 – as in 40 years old.

This decade saw so many ups and downs, So many gains and so many losses. However, all of the losses make the gains so much more exuberant. I became a dad and also an uncle (which is like being a dad, except you can just send the little tyke home when you are done playing with them!!!)

This decade was pretty nuts… I “went viral” as is the popular phrase these days for my Harry Potter Cupboard Under the Stairs that i build for the boys… so that in of itself is pretty indicative of what this decade was like!

If I had to summarize the last ten years in a sentence or two it would read something like this… I fell more deeply in love with my beautiful wife then I ever imagined possible. I lost my person, my grandfather, but I gained two of the most amazing little boys anyone could ever ask for. (ohh… and I won a Super Bowl)!

The decade started out with me taking the career path I always envisioned, as I took my first administrative job as an assistant principal, which I later parlayed itself into becoming a principal, including turning that first building around from a “Tier 3 Schools” in need of improvement to a “Tier 1 School of High Distinction, High Achievement and High Growth” in under three years. I’m proud of what was accomplished and I’m proud of the amazing students that worked so hard every day.

As I said earlier, there were losses. I lost my last two grandparents. Pop, left us the day after Thanksgiving in 2016. Jackson still talks about him, and unfortunately Oliver will only know him through the stories that are still told at the dinner table like folk tales. Steph lost her father, which was one of the hardest to explain to our little ones.

I was able to walk in the footsteps of Harry, Ron and Hermione in the Wizarding World of Harry Potter (four times). I caught wide receiver Jordy Nelson during a Lambeau Leap and visited Broadway a few times.

Stephanie and I moved into our dream house in an amazing community with some of the greatest neighbors anyone could ever ask for. Our children love all their new friends and we are so lucky to have amazing people around us everyday.

There is no better part of the last ten years than that of bringing into this world two of the most amazing little boys that have ever lived. Jackson and Oliver have made Stephanie’s and my life so much more than we could have ever asked for all those years ago. They have changed my life. They make every moment of my life better, more important and most of worth living.

To Stephanie,

It hasn’t always been perfect… but two decades have gone by with you and my hope is that the next many decades are spent by your side. Our boys are lucky to have you as their mother, their protector and their best friend.

2010 ➡️ 2020

Kings in the North

Oliver straight up predicting the Packers win to wrap up the NFC North Division Crown was pretty astonishing. (He gave a 36-10 prediction before the game began. However there’s a debate if he skipped 24 in his counting therefor possible giving a prediction of 23-10… the actual final score).

Either way this kid in his too tight Packers PJ onesie and Aaron Rodgers are on their way to the playoffs as The Kings of the North.

Scott’s Brats (The Lambeau Field of Aruba)

I feel like it’s been about 100 years since the last time I visited Scott’s Brats, a small beach front stand that serves authentic Wisconsin food. The best part is Scott, the owner, is a HUGE Packers fan.

His stand covered in Palm leaves and surrounded by the Caribbean Sea, but what stood out most (besides the amazing brats or Italian sausage on a Italian bread) was the Packers memorabilia and amazing license plates from all around the world, most depicting some sort of Packers saying. I took a picture with Scott before we left and told him we’d be back one day. I also asked him if I could buy one of his license plates. He told me he was still collecting them and the next time I came he’d give me one.

Well years later we came back. I had been telling the boys all about the guy in Aruba who loves the Packers. They were exited to meet him. Scott’s Brats is still standing, unfortunately no more Scott (he sold it to retire to beach life a few years back) and now that authentic Wisconsin food has a with a touch of Aruban flavor).

Matt, the new owner has kept the Packers memorabilia up and has added more license plates from all over Aruba. When I told him the story about the first time I met Scott, he grabbed a hammer, took down that Packers license plate from all those years ago and gladly handed it over to me. That golden “GOPACK” plate from “One Happy Island” will display nicely in the basement and remind me and the boys of our first vacation together, of the warm ocean, the hot sun, some great food and the fact that Packers fans are everywhere.

#GOPACKGO

Family Traditions

Traditions and rituals are more than just repetition… they often tell a story. A family sets it’s foundation on traditions… from the small of a secret handshake with your son or the big of a thanksgiving feast with all your relatives. On the macro level, traditions can teach children where their family came from or give them insights into their cultural or religious history. On a more micro level, traditions can serve as reminders of events that have shaped your family or reminders of great friendships.

There is irrefutable research that shows families hat engage is “traditions” have a stronger connection with one another. Traditions can be particularly effective during times of change or grief. When we moved and he had to go to sleep in a new room, Jax knew every night we would read a few books and “count the stars on his ceiling” before I kissed him goodnight. It provided him with a sense of security in a new environment.

Jax and I have our secret handshake: (Shout out to Aaron Rodgers and Jordy Nelson who were the inspiration for this). But, Oliver and I were still searching for that father-son tradition.

That was until I realized we need search no more… we didn’t need to find one, because traditions aren’t just thought up one day. They are created authentically and often times are the moments that you don’t even think twice about. It was there right in front of our faces!

Every night before he goes down to sleep, Oliver climbs up on me and settles his head on my shoulder and says, well he doesn’t really say anything. He isn’t really talking much at this point. But, I know what he’s thinking… he’s thinking he really wants his dad to sing him to sleep… a lullaby, a beautiful, calming rendition of his favorite song… Hush, Little Baby.

This is our tradition. Jax never really took to my singing (probably because it sounds like multiple cats crying). However, Ollie… he loves snuggling with dad and listening to the smooth, sweet tones of his father’s voice whispering one of the most well-known lullabies as he drifts off into dream land.

The best part of this… I have no idea, literally none whatsoever, what the lyrics to this song really are. I’ve tried everything. I rhymed real words and made up words… I’ve tried looking up the lyrics, but I can’t remember them in the heat of the performance. I feel like I do when I’m in the car belting out Journey’s Don’t Stop Believing… apparently it’s not, “smelly wine and sheep perfume.” Then there’s anything by Notorious BIG (including the ever confusing), “Birthdays were the worst days/ Now we sip champagne every Thursday.” I know a few words and the rest are completely made up.

That brings us to the greatest tradition our family knows… dad and Oliver’s version of Hush, Little Baby:

Hush, little baby, don’t say a word, Daddy’s gonna buy you a mockingbird.

And if that mockingbird don’t sing, Daddy’s gonna buy you a diamond ring.

And if that diamond ring don’t shine, Daddy’s gonna buy you an air freshener that smells like pine.

And if that air freshener doesn’t smell right, Daddy’s gonna buy you a dragon kite.

Different lyrics… same tradition… and it puts the kid to sleep… EVERY.DAMN.NIGHT.

Doesn’t matter where… when he hears Dad’s version of Hush, Little Baby.., he’s out cold

My Kids > OCD (Only on December 26th)

Every toy has been unwrapped, opened, put together, had batteries installed and played with. Now to shove them in a corner so the boys can play with the toys Jackson got for his first birthday three years ago. Matching outfits are packed away never to be seen again until the above picture comes out at some holiday get together 20 years from now.

Elfie has returned to the North Pole… (thank god)!!! Santa has come and gone and in his wake is enough cardboard and wrapping paper to pollute the Mississippi River (I still can’t spell without that little tune we learned in third grade). Only one wine glass was broken yet somehow 30 more boxes of decorations than we owned last year seem to have made their way into the attic.

I’ve written about this before, but I still contend that the day after Christmas (especially for someone with OCD) is the worst “day after holiday” of the year. Yea, I know what I’m saying… I was up all night and celebrated a Packers Super Bowl win just a few years ago and had to get up early the next day for work, but that was a joyous wake up… my team won the Super Bowl, so who cares about that day after… I get it… but for me the day after XMAS has always been a disaster.

However, this year… I tried to let it go as best as I could. I let stuff stay out, I didn’t pack up ornaments or the garland on the mantle. the leftovers weren’t nearly packed in separate Tupperware (yup… that’s right, I just covered them with tinfoil). I allows my children to play with their toys and didn’t even make them put one away before playing with another. I sat comfortably while a fire burned warmly in the fireplace, and enjoyed watching my two little boys play together with all the new toys Santa left them the day before.

This Christmas was about them… not me… not anyone… just them… and I enjoyed that much more than a day of OCD controlled cleaning and organizing like I usually do on December 26th… (at least for today).