Illegal Apples and the One-Eyed Horse

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Whenever Staci Miller (from Staci Miller Photography) and the Fragola’s get together it there is a whirlwind of mayhem, a tornado of destruction and whole ton of amazing pictures!!!  This photo shoot was no different.  We had rotten apples being tossed around like a football, the Apple Orchard Police Department putting an APB on our lovely photographer and a horse who now looks like a pirate as a result of an inquisitive three and a half year old.

You know its going to be interesting when your day starts out with statements such as, “Please do not have your child ride in the apple cart, it is for apples not children,” and, “Watch your back and let me know if you see anyone looking out at us from the barn windows.”  Apparently, photographs (the simple process and practice, which has been around for almost 200 years, the word “photograph” was coined in 1839 by Sir John Herschel, is not something to take lightly upon entering a family friendly apple orchard.  But when you have an expert at snapping little children who smile for all of about 13 nanoseconds at a time, getting photos and getting out is not an issue.

There were some awkward moments and there were some priceless ones as well, with the low light coming when Jackson (by accident) poked the first horse he’s ever seen in person in the eye.  I mean like really jabbed it in there!  Surprisingly, Jackson didn’t get kicked into orbit, but there is a good chance that horse is now wearing an eye patch.  All in all, another successful day with Staci Miller Photography!

DISCLAIMER: “No Animals Were Harmed in the Making of this Blog” 

Jackson and the Pirate Eye Patch

I’m starting to feel like writing about my horrible parenting fails is becoming an ongoing theme as of late… If I’m not offering up my son to a group of bears (what is a group of bears called…?), or screwing up some sort of toy assembly then I have nothing to write about.  Well good thing i almost blinded my son yesterday so I have something to blog about.

Here’s another example of where the so called “parenting handbook” failed us again.  (Note the sarcasm in that statement… You know because there really isn’t a parenting hand book… Unless you count this blog, which in that case I feel bad for your kid).

But I digress… So the failed parenting thing… Yeah… Well I apparently after years of being able to somewhat take care of myself (I have a decent set of self-help skills) I have forgotten the most basic step in applying sun screen, or really anything for that matter… DON’T GET IT IN YOUR EYE!

Here in lies the problem.  Basically anything with in a one mike radius of a one year old is going to either wind up in his mouth or all over his hands which will then be put in his mouth or rubbed on his eyes.  Sunscreen presents a no win situation for parents.  You’re damned if you do and you’re damned if you don’t.  Put that sunscreen on and you’re basically asking for your son I need a guide dog the rest of his life… Leave the sun block off and the, Kid burns up like he visited the surface of the sun for a week.

So, like any idiot good dad would do, I slathered half the tube of sun block on him.  Now I will say this… Stephanie thinks that applying an SPF 15 twice is the same as applying an SPF 30… I put on a ton of block because I was afraid I’d miss a spot, not because I don’t understand how sunscreen SPF ratings work.  Regardless, a pool of of this crap wound up in his eye and in his mouth.

Walk it off dude

Walk it off dude

Hours of crying ensued… and now I know that baths, wash clothes, paper towels, power washers, etc will not reduce the amount of screaming a one year old does when there is sun screen in his eye.  All I kept thinking was this poor kid was going to have to wear a eye patch like a pirate the rest of his life!

Sorry dude… time heals all wounds… it healed your eye… I hope it heals your mental scars from your father almost blinding you too.

Jax’ First Halloweenie

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Halloween was never a favorite of mine.  I don’t eat candy nor was I ever a big proponent of scary movies, scary stories, etc.  But I guess if you can get past those issues and all the ridiculous pumpkin flavored crap being pushed than its not so bad of a holiday.  Mom seems to love it… she always enjoyed dressing up with her friends and going out… plus she loves candy.

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I haven’t been Trick or Treating since I was a kid… but this year we made it out to four houses with the little guy on his first halloween.  We’ve dressed up the pups for years, but never took them out (although they did win 1st and 2nd place in the costume contest at Doggie Day Care a few years back.

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It’s such an interesting holiday when you think about it… Let’s dress up in someone else’s clothes and walk around to people we don’t know and ask them for free stuff… better yet, lets ask them for chocolate and sugar, not money or something useful like that.  When we are done let’s take all that candy home and organize it and then eat a piece a day until 2047.

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Either way it was fun getting the little guy all dressed up as Pirate Captain Jack.  He enjoyed the attention walking around to houses and was even pretty skilled at shoving his hand into the bowl and pulling out a giant candy bar.  (As an aside, our neighbor Ron came bye to see Jax and told us his youngest finally asked to go out with his friends on his own).  It was sort of a passing of the torch.  All in all, fall, pumpkins, candy and kids go together, so we better join in and enjoy!

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“Ahoy, me Hearties. It is I Cap’n Jack Come join me tonight as I plunder these here houses for bountiful booty!” #FirstHalloween #CaptainJack #Pirate #Booty

Captain Jack

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Ok so there are 2 schools of thought here. Either 1- Max is sharing his baby with his little brother or 2- Max is trying the old switcharoo so he can sneak Jax outside and bury him in the garden.

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Uncle Dusty and Capt. Jack #Pirate #Boat #UncleAndNephew