Throwback Thursday. An oldie but a goodie
Received: 05/19/2014 2:26 AM
Type: Surveillance
Location: Nursery
Present: Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad, Jax Carmine
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TRANSCRIPT BEGINS:
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Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad: hunny… hunny, whats wrong?
Jax Carmine: [Inaudible Scream]
Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad: Whats wrong little man?
Jax Carmine: [Inaudible Scream]
Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad: Relax little man… Come on, come lay with mommy.
Jax Carmine: [PROLONGED Inaudible Scream]
Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad: Ok – just fine lay on the changing table, then, and calm down, please?
[Pause]
Jax Carmine: [Wimper Sound] followed by 3 sniffs
Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad: Good now come sit with mama and we’ll rock on the new chair
[Pause as Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad gently picks up child and transfers him to new rocking chair.]
Mrs.ChroniclesOfANewDad: Why do you get so upset? I love you so much… can’t you just relax and go to sleep… mommy is so tired. Are you ready for bed now?
Jax Carmine: [Pause] followed by Inaudible Blood Curdling Scream.
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END OF TRANSCRIPT
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So Grandpa Soprano strikes again… A cute picture text to the family unit turns out to be a question about Tommy Hilfiger.
This was a great way to start the morning. Although I do think this TOMMY TIME thing could catch on… Maybe I’ll start a Blog called FashionBaby … And yes my wife’s contact information in my phone is titled “Love of my Life.” That’s a story for another day.
Dropping tweet heat at 2:06 AM.
#DadOfTheYear #DirtyDiapers #NewDad #GoTheF2Sleep #TweetGameIsHot&SoAreTheseDiapers
1. Does the 5 second rule apply to pacifiers?
2. If I put 2 diapers on you at once does that mean you can go double the amount of time before I have to change you?
I can not believe how much this kid loves to eat. I guess this is that “cluster feeding” thing bc all he does is destroy bottles and boobs. I could win the lottery while an army of Victoria secret models show up at my doorstep with the sole mission of perfecting the art of massage and I wouldn’t feel a 1/1000th of the happiness of this kid with his bottle.
Jax knows how to get the most out of the little things in life and I respect the shit out of his game. It’s the definition of pure, unadulterated joy. I wish I can love something as much as this boy loves his milk.