No way did we get this much stuff when we were kids!
Don’t get me wrong. Santa hooked me up every year and we never went wanting, but I remember getting a WWF Wrestling Buddy, a 1987 Topps factory set and a Rickey Henderson autograph and I literally thought Santa went broke just on our Christmas presents every year!!!.
PS: the single greatest XMAS present ever given to any child:
We now have trees downright declaring war on society… mother nature has had enough of the pollution and littering so she is fighting back. This tree isn’t going to stand idly by while deforestation continues on 24-7 like its no big deal. As soon as I saw this video I started rubbing my eyes and my throat was as itchy as can be.
Two days after the trees began fighting back I lost my voice, my mother in-law is basically on bed rest and my son looks like he went eight rounds with Ivan Drago.
I know that cancer and heart attacks are the number one and two killers in the world (and trust me I would know as my family has been ravaged by both for years), but pollen has to be running a close third. I haven’t had bad allergies in ages, but all of a sudden I sound like Louis Armstrong and my eyes feel Mr. Fuji just threw a handful of salt in them. I’ve sniffed enough saline nasal spray to send my sodium levels through the roof and seem to be immune to Claritin.
So yea.. I’d say mother nature is pissed… and she’s taking things into her own hands this time.
So the day is here… Freaking Wentworth Miller has finally broken out of prison. I thought we’d have learned last year when he pulled himself up and over the top rope and crashed down on the floor like Shane-O-Mac flying from the top of the hell-in-the-cell. 
Apparently Houdini had other thoughts… Guess it’s almost time for a big boy bed!!!
Let’s break down the entire process:
I think it was The Rock that once said, “Do you want to sleep in….??…. IT DOESNT MATTER WHAT YOU WANT!!!!”
When you have an eight month old your needs and wants are no longer ranked in the top 100 things of importance. You can’t keep up with this little man. Kid is taking business calls at 6AM.
Therefore, it is necessary to keep pounds of coffee on hand. So what happens when you wake up to this:
Hot chocolate and a random Dunkin decaf.
Well the fear and desperation and realization that you are going to have to face 6AM with a fully awake eight month old tends to get your brain working in overtime… And boy did it ever.
Let me introduce to you to the process that led me to the invention of the millennium:
STEP ONE: Freak the hell out when you realize there’s no coffee.
STEP TWO: Calm down… And think your situation through.
STEP THREE: Take inventory of your materials.
STEP FOUR: Use what you have and begin working!
STEP FIVE: Experiment.
STEP SIX: If at first you don’t succeed, try-try again.
STEP SEVEN: Give it another go.
STEP EIGHT: enjoy the fruits of your labor!
Sorry Son: Chronicles of a New Dad 